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Desc:Part of Santa's new 'start 'em young' policy
Category:Crime, Video Games
Tags:santa, porn, 3DS, inappropriate crying
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Comment count is 11
"refurbished" that's basically taking smudges off the screen and repackaging
And some sort of sullen Santa shaming fetish is born.
Sounds like the plot of the next Silent Night Deadly Night film

Likely scenario: Santa went to Gamestop to buy a 3DS. The store clerk immediately pushed used ('refurbished') shit on him that was "just brought in yesterday, but's like totally brand new, works just as great." Santa bought it because the price was 10% lower than a 'NEW' 3DS, but declined offers for a free GameInformer, a trial Power Up Rewards card, a pre-order for "Grand Theft Auto V" ("you won't be able to get it the day it comes out unless you reserve it now") and special store credit for trading in Playstation 2 games.

Also likely: the five-year-old forgot about the images of penetrated vaginas two minutes after seeing them, but started to cry because suddenly everyone else in the room was crying.
Yes, hopefully when he's 18 or 20 he will know NOTHING about sex. That sounds like the best outcome.
This is all about conveying the message that it's not okay to talk about sex.

People like to talk about the "innocence of children" and how precious it is, but having been a child on the other side of that all I heard was "you are less valuable because you have been tainted by sex. If you want to be loved, you have to keep your molestation a secret".

Kids are huge blabbermouths, and bullshit like this is pretty much the only way to rape them without them immediately telling everybody. It should be no fucking surprise that the priests that told us to do all this shit are actively harboring child molesters when they aren't molesting children themselves.

Rodents of Unusual Size
One day...when he's 14...his mother will walk in on him in his room...and the candy cane.
Adham Nu'man
"WOAH DAD! There are naked ladies on this thing you gave me!"

"NO SHIT SON! THAT's GREAT! Now listen to me, we'll call the news, they'll come over, you cry, I cry, goddamn it we all cry, and then Santa will bring you a Wii-U and lots of other toys, ok Kids?"
This reminds me of an old cartoon I watched a couple of times. One that's probably public domain now that was shoved on a VHS collection of ancient animated shorts.

This creepy looking Santa brings an orphanage full of children a pile of toys. After Santa leaves, the children are all happy and excited about their new toys until EVERY SINGLE CHILD'S TOY BREAKS, and the room fills with weeping and tears.

The same thing happened here. Everybody was having a nice Christmas morning until the pussy pics showed up, and then everyone's joyous holiday became a chorus of wails.
Jet Bin Fever
He's just mad because his kids found porn a couple years earlier than they would at a friend's house.
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