|That guy |
This video seemed tasteless and mean spirited, but I was totally sold on that amazingly victorious rain forest music.
|Sexy Duck Cop |
The "14 Branchland Court" incident was probably the low point of the comic-opera that is Christian Weston Chandler's life.
It's pretty low, but I'd consider this more of a dénouement than a tragic climax, which was probably either the vehicular assault charge or Bob Walks In.
Much like the stock market, we've yet to test the depths to which this creature will plunge. Frankly, I didn't think we'd see homelessness before his mother passes away.
Sexy Duck Cop
Ozymandias: "Did I do the right thing, Jon, in the end?"
Dr. Manhattan: "Adrian, nothing ever ends."
(Chris swings a bindlestick full of dildos and Pixelblocks over his shoulder, walks off into the sunset to the Kill Bill end theme)
I was referencing "I Think We're Alone Now";
"I think the Katana Incident was the low point of the comic-opera that is Jeff Dean Turner's Life"
Haven't watched the documentary? You really should.
So from what I can tell, those old razor outlets in bathrooms in older houses had a transformer that would blow out if something was plugged into it that drew more power than it could handle.
What is the likelihood that Chris plugged a coffee maker into one of these razor outlets, and caused the fire that spread from the bathroom?
I know modern outlets have a breaker that trips and simply deactivates the outlet, however considering the house was old as fuck, and those old outlets had the transformer which literally blew out.
I'm just wondering the chance that something went awry and started a fire.
What went awry: Barb Chandler + Chris Chandler + enough time = disaster.
Sexy Duck Cop
Let's not neglect the possibility that Chris-Chan somehow caused the coffee itself to catch fire.
The house could have been old. The wiring could have been subpar, or the outlet could have been overloaded. If a Keurig coffee maker (which uses 400-500 watts and peaks out at 1500 watts) was in an outlet that was overloaded, then that could cause a problem. Newer homes like mine are designed to flip a circuit breaker if the electricity used is over a certain number of amps. A house should also be maintained as if water gets into the wiring, or animals, or bugs, or roaches, then all bets can be off.
My guess is the age of the house coupled with the fact that there was hoarding indicates that more than the Keurig was plugged into the outlet, or that the bathroom outlet wasn't designed to handle 1500 watts (older bathrooms likely aren't), or the bathroom outlet was on a circuit breaker that included other appliances in another room, which could have still overloaded the circuit.
It's also possible that Chris is so incompetent that he could have put something on or next to the heating element. I think they (like other coffee makers) are designed to turn off if there is no more water, but that doesn't prevent junk from getting too close to the heating element in a hoarding situation - and that element WILL get hot enough to ignite paper I believe.
It's also possible that Chris was lighting something else in the bathroom, or it wasn't the coffee maker, or something else ignited in or near the bathroom. It's possible that the last thing he remembers was making coffee, and it could have been hours ago since he's terrible with time and distances, and something else could have started the fire.
I will say this though, since it was a fire hazard, and since there is evidence on the internets that it was a hoarding situation, it's likely that the insurance will say it wasn't an accident - or that if it was they won't pay out that much.
I'm also surprised nobody has driven by the house yet to take damage photos to prove how bad it was.
Most Keurigs (all the ones I've seen) just have a water reservoir with a rapid-boil system inside the machine; there's no exposed heating elements and once the cup is full it's more or less inert. They make excellent coffee, as well.
Seriously, I just went and make a cup of coffee with the machine I have here; it would take an effort of will to start a fire with it.
I might give it a try. If anything interesting happens I'll post the video to youtube. I even have a kitten I can record fleeing from the conflagration.
It's definitely suspicious. I'd not trust Chris to even understand the cause. If I had to guess, I'd say he a) didn't have a GFI outlet and b) he had an extension cord plugged in to the outlet, driving a lot of other loads besides the coffee machine. That would cause the cord to overheat, and given the piles of rubbish everywhere, there's your fire.
If the insurance company pays on this claim, it will be charity on their part, because there's ample evidence on the internet for an adjuster to shit-can the entire claim. I hope they do pay out, because if they don't we'll see a quick and ugly death spiral for Chris. I'm not sure why he is so hated; he's a foolish clown, not a murderer. The above clip seems pretty hard hearted given all the free entertainment this fool has provided us.
Also : BorrowedSolution, your flooding the hopper with fake Waugh clips was inspired. I raise my chain saw in salute!
Also, I've got to admit that EvilHomer helped with the genesis of the concept; I'd already snuck the woman crying like a baby vid through the hopper and wasn't really intending to do much more than that until Homer called for 'Fake Waugh Submissions' week and I got a hard-on that a cat couldn't scratch.
This video really is a brilliant allegory for the whole proceedings.
|Rodents of Unusual Size |
Russia Today hates CWC...I had no idea.
Frankly, it seems wrong. Fire was the death of Masaokis, being crushed under a pile of National Geographics and slowly starving to death and ultimately found a dessicated mummy when the 2020 Census man comes is more CWC's speed.
Unless this is a recent development, I believe I saw new video of Masaokis, maybe like a year ago.
I find no mention of masaokis dying anywhere. Leaving Youtube Forever, maybe, but there are oft-repeated rumours that he frequents a hockey forum. I think he just wants to be left alone, guise.
Just because they stop entertaining us doesn't mean you have to start telling everybody they died in a fire, you unbelievable bastards.
But, you know, whatever.
No, it's that fire should be Masao's inevitable death. The only exhibit I'm fairly certain actually is dead is Ractalfece.
Ulillillia will discover the Elixir of Immortality and bury us all.
Ractalfece, like Icarus, soared too high. And the gods, being petty, smote him.
But really, he called God an eyeball.
Ractalfece is possibly the only true, genuine, human-consciousness expanding poet our generation has actually produced. I mean that completely and sincerely.
Look, we've all sucked off a dead guy (I hope); you don't have to prove your devotion to us, buddy.
|Jet Bin Fever |
It was only a matter of time. I feel sorry for him. And, if anything could ever be sufficient cause for them to get a fresh start, this is it. Nothing will change though, because the house was always only part of the disease. They'll just find a new place to live and fill it up with garbage as well.
Sexy Duck Cop
I dunno. While Chris using this as an opportunity to start anew is absurdly optimistic, it's just as impossible for him to return to the status quo. Until now, the only thing enabling him to coast by on inertia was the fact that his Social Security covered the entire cost of living; with his home and car paid off, the only things he really needed to spend money on were utilities, microwavable pizzas, and his unstoppable dildo army. That is no longer an option.
He has no friends or family willing to take him and his mother in for the long-term. They'll have to get a two-bedroom apartment, and even in rural Virginia, that's gonna take a huge bite out of his monthly welfare check. Plus, we know Barb is unwilling and unable to work, so Christian will essentially be footing the bill for both of them. For the first time, he'll absolutely have to get a job or face eviction.
If this tragedy forces Christian to grow up, it won't be by choice. He'll be dragged into adulthood kicking and screaming, but that doesn't mean it won't happen.
Cherry Pop Culture
According to one of the guys at the CWCki, the house hasn't been paid off. There is a lot of financial irresponsibility in the family apparently. Wouldn't the Chandlers qualify for Section 8 housing?
| Register or login To Post a Comment|