Well I'll give you a hint, I don't work for Federal Express

KEEP THE TEXANS IN TEXAS!

If we don't keep those snow honkies in Colorado they're going to overrun us with their overpriced corporate marijuana and winter sports.

They’re crossing the state border to gentrify is!

WE'RE happy to stay here. YOU hillbilly fucks keep wandering in and flying into the fucking median the instant it goes below freezing.

Listen, mr stoner-yeti, I’m Southern Californian so all I need to crash my car is moderate rain!

Yeah go back to Breckenridge, Mr. Patagonia.

I've been hearing, and a lot of people don't know about this, but I've been hearing, from a lot of people, and believe me, right now I'm like a maven, I know probably more about this than anybody, but believe me, a lot of people are saying, they're saying, are the Rockies up to it? And, trust me, this is what a lot of people don't know, it's er-- it's erode-- erosion, the Rockies, they erode. Believe me, they erode. More than you want to know. Erosion. Bad stuff. And so, with this bad, bad erosion, maybe the worst thing about mountains, the erosion, it makes the mountains smaller. People call them the Rockies, I tell--I told Melania the other night, I said, are they still the Rockies? I mean, really the Rockies? Because if you ask me, they might just be the... be the Gravelies. The Pebbles. I call 'em the Pebblies. Because, with the erosion, they're making our ground lower. We don't have as much ground. So, they, you know, they can get through. Low ground, no barrier, you can come right through. Hello, yes, no security, just--fwwshht!--you're in there. Believe me. So, the ground, it's low. And people don't think about this, but if the ground is low, you can't stop people from coming in. You need, not everybody knows this, you know high ground. Hugely high ground, you can't just [*gesticulates*] around. It's... Believe me. It's a huge problem. But we're working on it. Believe me, we're working on it. And we have a solution. You're gonna love it when you see it. A permanent solution. It's, it's a, it's gonna be great.

exy for president

That really was well done.