I propose that Talk Like A Pirate Day should be replaced by Sing Like R. Kelly day.
I fully support this initiative.
|Sean Robinson |
I know it is a really pat thing to say, but wholly shit does cocaine do some wonderful things.
I think that R Kelly and Brian Wilson need to hang out and explore the textures of sound while they make up songs about whatever is going on in the room.
you called my mama's house and what? Girl, my mama ain't gotta screen no calls from meeee. Real talk!
I love how he did this entire thing with half his hair unrolled.
And then the dudes get into a fight at the end and oh my god i wish i could spend just one day as part of r. kelly's entourage. seriously.
No, Robert. I don't know what you mean.
|Billy Buttsex |
One: Dear R Kelly, you're famous. Going to a club alone is going to ruin your relationships, DUMBASS. I don't even do that now, and I'm not famous.
Two: You're an R&B singer, which means you're girlfriend's probably not a high quality person anyway. Get a new one.
a high quality person is a girl who doesn't bang guys like R. Kelly.
UGH. And I said "you're" instead of "your." Now *I'm* not a high quality person. Maybe now I can date R. Kelly.
|Thatcher Pennywhistle |
Slowly transitioning from man to myth.
Kool Keith may be Black Elvis, but R. Kelly is Black Michael Jackson.
And yes, you know exactly what I mean.
Men: Sing this when you're in the doghouse and hopefully your girlfriend's hysterical laughter will help her forget whatever you did
God. I love this guy.
BITCH I WISH YOU WOULD BURN MY MOTHERFUCKING CLOOOOTHES!
Also, I think the end of the video explains perfectly well why R. has to go to clubs, security guards.
He.. he KNOWS he's parodying himself, right? Right?!
And fuck you, thats how I wear my underpants.
"What they eat don't make us shit"
R. Kelly is so real that he doesn't even need to make things rhyme anymore.
|Frank Rizzo |
when does he piss all over an underage girl?
this is the worst.... thing ever. song? fail...
major lulz for the staged fight though. OOOO TOUGH GUYS!!!
The man is wearing a sequined sports jacket and gucci sunglasses INDOORS and you give it one star. WHAT DOES HE HAVE TO DO TO PLEASE YOU?
Holy fuck I was wrong that is a sequined hooded sweatshirt? AH MAH GHAD
How's that jacking off to anime on 4chan working out for you?
not good, my mom walked in on me and threw out her back.
Stop treating your body like it was an AMUUUSEMENT park.
Rizzo's mom walked in all shocked at him jackin' off and then she threw her back all outta wack!
PICS OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN
|Honest Abe |
In 20 years this guy is going to be doing Priceline.com commercials ala William Shatner.
Spoken word's future is secure.
In case you were wondering what profanity represents, now you know: profanity represents just how real shit gets.
|bang to buck ratio |
Someone teach this man how to write a chorus and also that women are equal and deserving of respect and understanding
|Jeff Fries |
Who is this Milton character
Holy shit this deserves ten stars.
"IS YOU TWEAKIN'?!"
This is exactly how I'm arguing with my girlfriend from now on. Real talk.
|fun nugget |
Five stars for using the words "TRIFLIN ASS".
Theres some real talk..
Is this a parody of Weird Al's song about going to a drive through for burgers, or vice versa?
I really wanna know where his logic was going with "were there other guys there?" Damn, that triflin' bitch for interrupting him.
On his next album he is going to sing-talk the assembly instructions for a MALM dresser from IKEA.
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