Terrible.

Suntory time!

Your attempts to make wine coolers appear manly are futile.

that isn't Bruce Willis, it's Bruno!

I wonder if the "Viva Viagra" people tried to get him for their ad.

"...when did it become the highest honor to sell-out?
Because it seems my disapproval of BRUCE WILLIS, and BRUCE WILLIS' greedy antics is the stuff of contempt amongst a population of faceless pseudo-intellectuals playing Devil's Advocate - or, are just utterly useless champions of BRUCE WILLIS who can't fathom 'good taste,' and will go on to live a modern day yuppie's existence, until death comes to save them.

If any of you give me shit because I don't think it's good for BRUCE WILLIS, with talent, to utterly decimate HIS reputation via incredibly awful marketing ploys, then you are indeed massively compatible, arrogant faggots."

"It's wet and it's dry" has to be the most unappealing slogans for a drink.

serenading a dog about wine coolers.

This also secretly appears at the end of my 'Jackie Rogers Jr. 0,000 Jackpot Wad' submission.

Did anyone else think he would have beautiful children with Demi?

As bad as Hudson Hawk.

Nostalgia +5

So I'm in fourth grade, right, and it's study hour or some other damn thing where the entire class is sitting quietly at their desks, right?
Someone starts humming this. Within a few seconds about five people are singing the lead part with the rest of us hitting the chorus in perfect harmony.

Repeat, of course. Every day for a week, of course.