How many laws are being broken here?

they couldn't dress it up a little so that we could pretend it wasn't just a wrongfully used piece of machinery?

5-Stars!

Safety.

All I can hear in my head is Sadé singing "Cool excavator.... coooool excavator.."

holy shit

That is the most dangerous thing I've ever seen, ever.

oh my fucking god

Missing the "alienjack" tag.

what could possibly go wrong?!

I'm not certain, but I think there's a reason that most rides are built in a way that the OPERATOR won't get dizzy.

The air thick with the stench of vomited funnel cakes and orange soda-based urine.

Just baking in the humid summer heat.

No! No. no no no no. Oh my fucking god, no!

"Room for one more, honey."

Alligator husks on the ground and spinning excavators in the sky.

While that does look like fun, I don't think I'd be comfortable riding in something that was intended to smash into the ground with (literally) earth-shattering force.

But was angular momentum conserved?

There needs to be an Ingenuity category

Just because the laws of circular motion say it's possible doesn't mean you should actually do it. Jesus, one wrong motion by the operator and 8 people go flying.