This screen marks perhaps the last moment in history when one could talk about ninjas kidnapping the president with complete earnestness and without a trace of self-conscious camp or wackyness. For that, five stars.
The most socially important game of its era, inspiring a generation to take a stand and finally say "No more presidential ninja kidnappings, goddammit." Finally, Ronald Reagan was safe to do his job.
Then later it turned out Reagan was a horrible blight on America.
My friends and I were talking about this game yesterday. You just don't see game intros like this one or Super Smash TVs anymore. Speaking of which, if that one isn't here then it needs to be.
If you are a fan of surrealistically translated video game intros, I recommend you find "Violence Fight" on MAME. It's just a crap Pit Fighter rip off but the intro tells us it features a criminal fighting ring made up of "reckless drivers and general business men".
Well, to his credit, he did have a thing for violating and defecating on various alien body parts, and lots of strange creatures just exploded all around him as part of his job and he didn't wear a mask or anything. He probably got some messed up disease, let's call it Space Herpes, because anything sounds funny if you add Space to it.
I can't see Duke Nukem in Administration in the late 80's. He's a man of action. Plus earth cocaine can't hold a candle to plutonium niborg, even though they cost the same, and earth in general just can't fulfill Duke's kind of needs, or his wild, outer space tastes. You don't even want to know what the hookers do out there. Nothing like these boring earth prudes. They don't even have some of the necessary anatomy.