Good point. I think his mom wanted him to be a garbage man more than he did.

I paused the video immediately after I heard that, hoping I could make that exact comment.

Alas...

"Life has a way of... heh, you know, things change."

How are you PoeTV worthy?

Fuck you.

She's clearly an alcoholic seeing as she named her son Jameson.

He seems like he is doped up.

Trevor wanted to be a garbage man from a very early age. It was his ultimate dream.

"Go away, kid," the garbage men would say whenever he'd accost them. "Trust us, you don't want our job. You'll always stink and you'll get maggots in your hair."

Trevor sighed. This is what comes of not having passion, he'd think. If he were a garbage man, he'd do it better. He'd be the greatest garbage man ever. He'd become rich and famous and appear on talk shows.

He'd be offered the role of landfill foreman in just a few months of starting, but he'd humbly turn it down. "Oh, I don't want that job," he'd say with consummate graciousness, "I'm happy merely doing what I do now. I'm happy serving the public and cleaning up for them. It's not for everyone, but it's perfect for me."

He'd appear in magazines, too, and speak out against environmentalism. "Who needs recycling?" He'd ask, "Not us. Too much of a hassle. Just throw your things away and we'll take care of the rest."

Trevor never got his dream job. But during long and tedious board meetings, when his underlings would give him the quarterly reports and tell him what a great improvement he was over the previous CEO, who embezzled billions, he'd stare wistfully out of the skyscraper's window -- to the trash cans below.

That's where I belong.

And when he was shredding and disposing of incriminating documents, he made sure to throw in some banana peels, some paper cups, and a stale sandwich, just for the noble men who had acheived what he simply could not.

That was a good story.

These are for you.

My pediatric doctor was a Krauthammer! He diagnosed my depression!

I wouldn't be surprised if he was autistic. Or an asshole.