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Desc:Chris-Chan's workout regimen. Or: The Saddest Training Montage of All Time.
Category:Stunts, Sports
Tags:montage, yo adrian i did it, Joe Esposito, Chris-Chan, the best around
Submitted:Hooper_X
Date:01/16/10
Views:1798
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Comment count is 42
Hooper_X
I'm probably as much over Chris-Chan as anyone else, but this made me laugh anyway.
Toenails
I will never be over Chris-chan.

This man-child is my Truman Show.

-1 for a clip show.

Hooper_X
This is not a clip show, dude. It's a training montage! He's all fat and dumb and slovenly at the beginning, but then there's a montage and at the end, he's even MORE fat and dumb and slovenly!

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THIS WORKS, DO YOU?

Camonk
Well, fuck you, Hoop. My comment was going to be about how I'm sick of Chrischan but enjoyed this anyhow.

Fine. Did you guys know that etymologists still don't know where the world "dog" comes from? True story!

Syd Midnight
Chris-chan is a big enough failure to have casual and part-time fans

kennydra
this is already 5 stars at floppy fail curls with capri sun boxes.
kennydra
oh wait those are lemonade 12 packs.

dangit.

RomancingTrain
Hey, those weigh 50 lbs. each; he stong, like Hercales.

HankFinch
That was pretty serious accusation against Capri-Sun. They pull a lot of weight around here... I don't know what's gotten into you... I'm sorry, but you'll have to turn in your badge and your gun.

Lemonade?!? How?... Oh yes... Of course. Knowing your father, I don't know how I could have doubted you. Here take these (badge, gun) You'll be needing them.

dead_cat
Only 50lbs when full.

pastorofmuppets
Heh. Back of the napkin says they're a little over 9. You mean he's taking cans out?

dead_cat
He's holding the boxes by just a handhold-strip cut into the sides, which are just thin cardboard. If the boxes weighed much, he'd have to either remove cans and brace what's left, or repack them altogether, just so they'd survive being pumped more than a few times.

pastorofmuppets
Chris-chan is a bouncer.

Burnov
Obviously the best part was when Chris brought it home with the guitar segment from 1:26 - onward.
HarrietTubmanPI
The only thing he doesn't fail at is failing. Everything else he half-asses or quarter-asses, but with failing he uses his entire ass and then some.
themilkshark
Grrrr flex!
Enjoy
Chris "The Situation"
Candlejackv616
More like Chris "The Dead Inside".

RomancingTrain
Chris "The Awkward Sitiation"

Riskbreaker
The guitar solo.
revdrew
Yes, oh yes.

mashedtater
good god yes.

revdrew
BIRTHDAY BOY
garcet71283
Between this and the Neon-Genesis of Chris Chan, my life is complete.

Also I still am not entirely sure he's not just some sort of mad genius of a troll.
pastorofmuppets
If CWC isn't autistic, no one is.

bopeton
Stars for the guitar solo but

He's just a troll, stop falling for it.

RomancingTrain
Chris-Chan is real stop fooling yourselves
http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/IT_TOOK_A_TALKING_BEAR_TO_GIVE_TH E_NAME_A_YOUNG_BOY_LOVES

Hooper_X
If he's a troll, he's been at this for like, 20 years. Or it's someone who knew the actual Chris Chandler way way back in the day and ran with it. It'd be like if I started posting ten years ago, claiming I was some other kid in my senior class of high school.

pastorofmuppets
There's a psych eval posted on CWCki as well. I wish I didn't know that.

oogaBooga
He's a troll. He's the most amazingly convincing troll the world has ever seen.

He is the method actor of trolls.

CharlesSmith
The fact that people think Chris-chan is faking is so indicative of the general attitude of the internet. It's so full of misinformation everyone assumes if something seems strange it must be a hoax.

Riskbreaker
All autistic people are trolls, just as every accident and natural disaster is planned by the NWO, amirite?

oogaBooga
It may be indicative of the general attitude of the internet, but the fact my view happens to coincide with it is purely coincidental.

If at one point he was totally serious, he has since become completely aware of his "popularity" (I use the term loosely) and is ramping up the fail-o-meter because he realizes it's the only way he can keep everyone's attention and not just miserably fade into the background.

For a time.

Rodents of Unusual Size
So he's like the human version of Spongebob Squarepants.

garcet71283
But what if he has been trolling since he was a child? What if he is some sore of troll-prodigy, the ultimate troll, one whose whole life has become one giant troll.

Camonk
Someone who would pretend to be this stupid is actually still this stupid. Just differently from how you'd think.

Hooper_X
Yeah, I think Camonk is onto something here. At least with Andy Kaufman-style trolling, there's a "I was smarter than you all along" angle. In this case it's just "I am fucking humiliating and you fell for me being incredibly humiliating."

Syd Midnight
He made a sex tape. Trolls don't make sex tapes. Trolls only pretend to humiliate themselves. Perhaps he thinks he's a troll, but he made a sex tape.

Rudy
In my minds eye I see Chris finishing doing his taxes, putting his three kids to bed and kissing his wife goodnight.

Then he goes down into the basement, puts on an ugly polo shirt and his pedo glasses and gets into character.

His fans are waiting...

Riskbreaker
Then that guy playing his dad, Bob, is one hell of an actor.

Corporate God King
Five for his Artie-strongest-man-in-the-world pose.
Oktay
Needs a Joe Esposito tag. Trust me.

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