Sometimes I question my disagreement with euthanasia and sterilization.

This one doesn't even get "This is why the terrorists hate us," this one gets "this is why you consider everybody who isn't immediately adjacent to you a terrorist".

As disturbing as 4:32 is, it ranks nowhere near as high as little kids guzzling soft drinks.

BLECH

Can they even use all those paper towels, aluminum foils, dish soaps, etc within their lifetimes? It especially looks to be too much considering how short her lifetime will be before heart disease takes her out. Poor Alana will have nothing to inherit but a wasted childhood and a Sam's Club inventory.

My favorite thing about this is the father's unending thousand-yard-stare.

Changing my username to Honey Boo Boo Chile.

I find that this video yields optimum levels of seething hatred if you watch it while keeping in mind that gay people aren't legally allowed to adopt children in most states.

Again, I say, TLC treads where few others dare: an unflinching documentation of the decline of America.


That, or it's just more white trash television.

Some day, these contests will feature stripper poles, and we won't even notice. (Unless some already do, and I didn't notice.)

This is just one of the many things that sometimes tempts me to go "no thanks" and go live out in the woods alone while waiting for a fiery sulphur rain to burn and scour this nation

I'll bet that kid could have grown into someone really smart and fun to be around, had she not been born to that thing.

Has their ever been a pageant mom on this show who hasn't looked like a sac of genetic failure?

That mom is god's gift to caricature artists.

"Munuh"

Also, since when is 'couponing' both an occupation and an identity? Is this a Georgia thing?

Her mom was beaming demon hambeast powers at her from the seats.

Holy shit, this is like meme-fuel 2000 or something. There's hardly any footage here that is not useable in some sort of YTP or mash up or whatever....

I just realized where I've seen the little girl before:

http://www.adclassix.com/a3/55campbellkids.htm

The parents already have the kids hopped up in substances in order for them to perform. Christ.

What are the odds that Alana reads at grade level?

Do they routinely have to subtitle the kids' speech for incomprehensibility?

Also, I'm a little disturbed in that I was surprised NOT to see some parent shotgunning Red Bull down their little darlin's throat.

I don't know how to interpret 4:32.

Jesus fucking christ. More like Portal of Depressing.

In no way when she's dancing in the audience is she projecting herself on that stage, seeing herself being charismatic and sassy and whatever her definition of likable is.

In no way.

Not a single way.

The real cruel joke is, I bet the kid lost because of her mom and one day that will be what tears them apart.

5:24 really hits home. Just look at this poor child's father.

Dad's dead eyed, 1000 yard stare sums up things perfectly.

He's the only semi-sane person in the video.

He regrets everything.

Wow.

I see a lot arrests in the future of Alana & co.

Damn, that little girl sounds like Dusty Rhoades.

For a person who frequently asks questions like "Why have we programmed our society to think covering your eyes with uncomfortable non-natural colors is beautiful" this is nearly rage-inducing.

At 0:50 I half expected Pingu to whip out the flame-thrower

needs a resubmit from a kind soul.

Your gonna be just as fat as your mom when you grow up. Once she breaks eight obesity ooohyeahh!!