All the cute parallels connecting Lohan and Taylor just make this project much more embarrassing for her to be starring in. The irony of her character asking what bored people do when they're not working is uproarious, it's almost as if the whole project was a planned intervention.
Please, Liz Taylor is so far of ahead of Lohan it's not even a contest. Let me know when Lindsey Lohan marries a truck driver she met in rehab and then we'll talk.
I wonder if it's possible to do partial dubs. You know, kind of like how they dub movies in other languages, except they dub another person's voice over hers, and only hers?
Of course it's possible. Tim Burton did it with Vincent D'Onofrio as Orson Welles in ED WOOD, and the result was pretty freaking uncanny, but for the star of the movie to have is done for the whole running time would have been a major embarrassment. Yeah, I know.
I saw an article about MEAN GIRLS the other day that referred to "Lindsey Lohan in her prime." To see that written about a 26 year old actress without a trace of self-conscious irony is about as sad as it gets. And she was the cutest child star ever, red hair and freckles for fucks sake.
I believe she was also technically a child star when her breasts became enormous. Those were confusing days... confusing days. Thanks God we are past that!
Compiled from other lists, here is a complete Liz and Dick drinking game:
Drink whenever
- Liz or Dick drinks in the movie
- Richard Burton has a drink in his hand
- Lindsay says something meta/4th wall break-ey
- Grant Bowler has to quote Shakespeare
- Someone wears a towel or a sheet instead of real clothing
- Lilo slathers on makeup like a clown
- You spot a bar cart in shot (to show the protags are alkies)
- You wonder what year it's supposed to be
- You wonder who that actor/actress is supposed to be
- Someone throws something at a wall
- Someone throws something at someone but hits the wall instead
- Someone faints or drops dead
- Jewelry is purchased or worn
- There is discussion of how fat/old people are but they're not wearing fat suits or age makeup
- Lilo's fake British accent slips back into her American one
- The veil slips and you see an actor/actress wondering why he/she is in this POS
- You start mentally recasting the movie with someone other than Lilo
- You drink at the same time someone else is drinking onscreen
- Lilo wears a dumb hat/scarf/wig
- a set looks cheesy
- you think of a way the real Liz Taylor would have described the movie
- Liz pouts about something
- whenever you laugh at the ACTING
- when you wonder how Lifetime looked at the final cut and thought it was okay to broadcast
- when you think how awful this portrays Liz Taylor and how she's rolling in her grave
- when Lilo as Liz screams for Dick
- when there is fake crying in a drunken fight
- someone mentions what # marriage Liz is in
- you see low budget attempts at a paparazzi crowd
- Richard Burton wears a turtleneck
- your dog or cat looks at the tv and attacks it out of terror/revulsion
- you wonder if this is a biopic about Rip Taylor instead of Liz Taylor
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