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Comment count is 43
Monkey Napoleon - 2013-10-31

I'm glad you threw the "arguably" in there.

5 more invisible stars for the crappy, convoluted way in which this clip was ripped.

SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-10-31

Somehow, this "ripping" technique could only improve it. This is an episode of Voyager so bad, nobody involved will talk about it. And given how awful Voyager was overall, that's saying something.

The way it handles "evolution" is even dumber than most of the stuff on the Answers In Genesis site.

Monkey Napoleon - 2013-10-31

Are you kidding? This isn't even the dumbest portrayal of evolution in Star Trek. Or, at the very least, there are several examples of it that are just as dumb. If the crew thought THIS was a low point, one wonders what kind of powder they were snorting the rest of the time.

Everything Star Trek is awful, and I love it.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-11-01

For me, the entire episode of "Tuvix" was the most cringeworthy moment in all of Star Trek, but this comes in second for white hot searing nerdrage.

Bort - 2013-11-01

"Tuvix" was the episode where you learned the entire Voyager crew was irredeemable.

jaunch - 2013-11-01

Yeah, they straight up murdered Tuvix as he was pleading for his life.

Bort - 2013-11-01

And tacked on a happy smiley "hooray, everything's better!" ending.

Bort - 2013-11-01

I gotta say, they could have repaired the "Tuvix" episode easily enough. All they had to do was say that Tuvix's combined genetic matrix was showing signs of deterioration (or some other babble), and while it wasn't guaranteed to be fatal, he had a stronger chance of survival if he were separated back into Tuvok and Neelix while that window is still open. Then you'd have a worthwhile dilemma.

Instead, they gave us a Tuvix who was happy and healthy, but Kes missed Neelix and Janeway missed Tuvok, therefore they were justified in murdering Tuvix.

Old_Zircon - 2013-10-31

Salamanders my ass, those are clearly axolotl.

pressed peanut sweepings - 2013-10-31

Axolotls are salamanders, you tard.

Bort - 2013-11-01

Somehow, I think that might be the greatest sentence ever posted here.

freedoom - 2013-10-31

i like how this is a shakey cam vid of another youtube video.

Monkey Napoleon - 2013-10-31

That was what struck me as well. In a way, I feel like the uploader deserves to be made fun of more than whoever wrote this piece of shit.

Pillager - 2013-10-31

What Prime Directive?

Seriously, I quit the series after this episode.

robotkarateman - 2013-10-31

Somehow this is worse than when TNG did the exact same thing, but only with blacklight lizard man suits instead of CG salamanders?

Nominal - 2013-10-31

There was a lot more going on in this episode to make it worse, and more interesting things in the TNG episode to make it better.

Monkey Napoleon - 2013-10-31

Be careful robotkarateman... suggesting that all iterations of the franchise are all equally terrible in different ways is heresy to internet nerd status quo. I'm sure it's because Voyager is really, really bad and has absolutely nothing to do with TNG being on the air when everyone here was growing up.

bac - 2013-11-01

That episode of TNG had nothing to do with evolution. It was about a parasite that turned people into the black light bipedal lizards. There was an episode of TNG that had to do with evolution. You got to see Riker dressed up like an ape-man, Worf turn into a giant murderous beetle and Picard freaking out because he's reverting into a Lemur. Needless to say, Data saved the day

Nominal - 2013-11-01

Nah. TNG is still objectively better than Voyager.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-11-01

That stupid evolution episode of TNG was directed by Gates McFadden. I don't think she directed again.

Barclay turned into a literal spiderfaced mutant and it was genuinely creepy. So at least there was something worthy about it.

The first season episode where Tasha Yar has to fight with some black chick over who gets to marry Space Shaka Zulu was another awful moment.

Nominal - 2013-11-01

The Yar cat fight was the 2nd episode of the whole series. First season TNG doesn't count when assigning suckage. Everyone knows to skip them. The thing I remember most about that episode was it being interrupted for Baby Jessica coverage.

Genesis was the low point outside of season 1. It came at the show's end where you could see Berman's influence start to ruin everything (not to mention McFadden's boring flat direction). Thank god the show ended soon after.

robotkarateman - 2013-11-04

What rose-colored visor are you using to look at the Star Trek world in order to convince yourself that "it got better after season 1!" is a true statement?

I'd personally rather be forced to watch all of season 1 back to back rather than have to sit through season 7's Irish sex ghost episode.

posertom - 2013-10-31

We must make "transformed by space magic" into a working tag. I nominate that shitty scene from riddick 2...

garcet71283 - 2013-10-31

No we just need one word:


garcet71283 - 2013-10-31

This clip would be improved if it just ends with them shooting the lizards and flying away.

Hooker - 2013-10-31

So I never actually watched this show. Isn't the Native American a space criminal who should look forward to the Starfleet captain essentially dying and leaving him the ship?

Monkey Napoleon - 2013-10-31

He doesn't want to see people die. He's even ex-starfleet. He's just part of rebel faction that disagrees with how the federation is/has handling/ed the situation with settlers along the Romulan border. The situation the crew finds themselves in throughout the series renders his opposition to starfleet irrelevant. So he pretty much just defaults back to being a regular starfleet officer.

Monkey Napoleon - 2013-10-31

Like a dummy I went to memory alpha to check and see if I was right AFTER I posted. Some stuff is wrong, but nothing important.

bac - 2013-11-01

Cardassian border not the Romulan border. And the Mahki or however their group name was spelled were a bunch of jerks.

Bort - 2013-11-01

"Maquis" -- it's not a space word invented for TNG and DS9:


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-11-01

The Maquis were almost a good idea, back when DS-9 started out. You had the Bajorans, a formerly occupied people, the Cardassians, who occupied them, and the Maquis, Federation settlers whose colonies were being given to the Cardassians as part of the peace settlement. The Maquis didn't agree with this arrangement, so they basically became terrorists. In the middle of all of this was the Federation, trying to keep the peace.

So wow, there's this four-player political fight set up against a backdrop of the formerly oppressed having a lost high-tech past involving aliens from a nearby wormhole. You had reality running up against a militaristic totalitarian state and a power with high ideals trying to stop the fighting.

But then they saw Babylon-5 had The Shadows and this big, cool arc about ancient godlike races and this big ol' war and even NASA was abandoning Star Trek as their go-to sci-fi show, so the writers said, "hey look, it's the Dominion!" And it went even further to shit.

EvilHomer - 2013-11-01

When does DS9 start sucking? I ran out of good Korean martial arts costume dramas to watch on Netflix, so I started checking out DS9. It's actually... decent, so far. Not great, but good by Star Trek standards - I like how there's some genuine conflict to the characters, and while that pilot episode shamelessly ripped off Encunter at Farpoint, it was actually BETTER than Farpoint. (more interesting, less preachy, and no Discord, who, let's face it, was at once the best and the worst character on TNG)

At what point should I stop watching?

Bort - 2013-11-01

SteamPoweredKleenex: you do realize the Dominion were mentioned on DS9 before the first episode of B5 even aired, right? The plan was for there to eventually be conflict with the powers on the other side of the wormhole, because seriously, how do you NOT do that. Hell, the fact that Odo was of the same race as the Founders was probably part of the original plan; certainly it was suggested in the pilot episode that he came from the other side of the wormhole.

EvilHomer: your mileage may vary, but I say DS9 never got to sucking. It peaked in season 4, it was pretty lame for the first half of season 5 (the episodes when Odo had lost his shapeshifting powers), but after that it picked up steam again. Be sure to pay attention to Vedic Wynn and (especially) Gul Dukat, both of whom are series bad guys, but are not motivated by standard "soon I will rule the universe moo-hoo-hoo-ha-ha-haaaaa!" logic. Also pay some attention to Major Kira, as one of the very few characters on TV who tries to use her faith to make her a better person.

Bhiu - 2013-11-01

I agree with Bort. DS9 was solid the whole way through. You need to watch the whole series so you can get to episode 6x19: In the Pale Moonlight. IMO, the best episode in all of Trek and the one that made Sisko the best captain of them all.

Binro the Heretic - 2013-10-31

I don't remember watching this episode.

It must have come on after that episode with the aliens who aged backwards into children. That's when I stopped watching the series.

Poor Kate Mulgrew. I felt so bad for her being on that show. She really didn't deserve it. I'm glad her career recovered and she managed to get onto a classy show like "NTSF:SD:SUV".

Mulgrew is an excellent actor and didn't deserve to be stuck on "Voyager". Neither did Robert Picardo.

Jeri Ryan totally deserved it, though.

Bort - 2013-11-01

I thought Jeri Ryan was a pretty good actress -- her Borg role didn't let her open up that often, but there was one episode where she started taking on the personalities of various beings the Borg had replicated, and she did pretty well sliding from this species to that (I specifically remember her taking on the mannerisms of a Ferengi).

We have Jeri Ryan to thank for Obama becoming President, or to put it differently, McCain / Palin NOT winning in 2008:

http://www.sheknows.com/entertainment/articles/806201/how-the- jeri-ryan-scandal-gives-us-barack-obama

Bort - 2014-07-09

"Assimilated", not "replicated". God damn it Bort.

namtar - 2013-11-01

This show would have been a hundred times better if wonky shit like this was permanent and gradually as the series went on the command officers were replaced by third and fourth string crew members.

Bort - 2013-11-01

That was sort of an episode of "DS9":


SteamPoweredKleenex - 2013-11-01

Not really, Bort, as the show was still self-contained.

Changes in the Voyager show should have been planned from the beginning. The premise of the series really demanded a fairly high cast turnover, not to mention an ever-evolving ship created from a patchwork of salvaged parts. The problem is that Berman/Braga had no idea of what kind of arc the show would follow, and even a ten-year-old familiar with Trek could see that they'd (poorly) written the show's setup, had no idea how long it would go on, and would just pull a two-parter series finale that would magically get Voyager back to the Alpha Quadrant.

This was exacerbated with how contracts for the actors on these shows worked. Everyone was guaranteed X amount of screen time, which is why you often get scenes put in with actors that make no sense other than just to give the people in the opening credits their quota of blah-blah-blah.

Voyager's setup could have been interesting, but it really needed the TV Trope of "anyone can die." I'm not just saying that because I didn't like a lot of the cast (though that was largely the fault of the writers), but this was the REAL frontier: No help, no support, and lots of hostiles. Death should've been a constant companion.

Bort - 2013-11-01

Like I said, "sort of". We saw the end result of letting (talented) cadets command a Defiant-class starship, and it wasn't pretty.

That said, I like your idea for the series. Ever watch any "Farscape"? There's some of that feel to it, where characters aren't always sure where their next meal will come from, or what sleazy deals they're going to have to make just to survive. The characters are decidedly NOT "Starfleet", they can barely even cooperate for their mutual survival some days. And some major characters did die.

cognitivedissonance - 2013-11-01

I'd like to present to you my Master's thesis on why everything after the pilot episode of TNG is inferior to Original Series.

Liberty University was polite.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-11-01

I hate this so goddamn much. Here are your stars.

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