Does "read Chaucer and Dante" count?

....in Middle English and Middle Italian...?

Leaving aside the fact that it's never a good idea to address an anonymous crowd as the community's "ranking" anything, I just find it fun that we probably know each other, possibly quite well.

...and if we don't, we really, really should.

Yea I know I probably sound blustery there rural, but if you're a medievalist specializing in Anglo-Saxon England I am sure we have shared drinks.

I was almost a history major, but chose music, comparative literature and philosophy instead. Plenty of historical context, but nobody wants to see a death match between Russell and Wittgenstein..

POETV themed session at K'zoo?

Not going this year, I usually attend Leeds. Ever make it to the MAP conference?

Oh and That Guy and IZ, anybody who knows Middle English is a friend of mine, and IZ and me are already homies.

IZ is a lot nicer than I am.... if you can stand the blogging he does here.

I'd say this is their biggest bid for legitimacy yet.

Its just America where MMA takes itself too seriously. In Japan they know how to have fun with it. They gave us Hong Man vs Jose Conseco.

MMA fans like to shit on prowrestling ignorant to the fact that MMA's roots are with prowrestling. The creator of Brazillian Jujitsu Mitsuyo Maeda was a Judo master who had to go into prowrestling, because he wasn't allowed to make money off Judo matches. This was back when being a prowrestler required real shooting skills and he took up some of the catch wrestling. He later traveled to Brazil and started teaching those scummy lying Gracys what he knew. Seriously fuck the Gracys.

It's Gracie you numbnuts.

Well then fuck the Gracie family.

So how scripted is MMA? I definitely saw a lot of "swing sword at opponent's shield for show" moves just jumpng to random spots in this.

If MMA is more true to its pro wrestling roots than I realized I'll actually heck it out some day.

Its not scripted, but its already feeling the need to be more like wrestling in flash and style. Nothing wrong with that. Muhammad Ali's showboating and trash talking were inspired by Gorgeous George.

Hey, Cena. How many international Judo and MMA championships have you won? More than the Gracies? Less than the Gracies?

You're just mad cuz the Gracies are the First Family of Badass. They're basically like fifty Rainbow Dashes, all at the same Rainbow family reunion.

I presently have fewer MMA championships than the Gracies. Of course, most of the ones they one were from tournaments they created. If the Gracies are like a family of Rainbow Dashes, then Sakuraba and Kimura are certainly Apples.

Excuse me, what makes you think Sakuraba is shitty? Stop being mean to him. Sakuraba isn't an Apple; he's a Rainbow Dash, too. He's got the Heart of a Pegasus.

And how many MMA tournaments did Kimura win...? Yeah, NONE, that's what I thought.

Kimura won plenty of tournaments and broke Helio Gracie's arm. Sakurava has the heart of an Apple. Pegasi are cool, bit earth ponies are the best.

Ah, but again, did he ever win any *MMA* tournaments? No. People win tournaments all the time. I once won a public speaking tournament back in highschool. Does that make me as badass as a Gracie? Of course not. And sure, he broke Helio Gracie's arm. He broke Helio Gracie's arm, _and Helio Gracie did not tap out._

Even when a Gracie is defeated, he does not submit.

Kimura, on the other hand, he almost bitched out of judo because he lost a few matches in the 1930s. "Wahh waah waah", he said. "I lost four matches in a row." Tell me: who's got more heart? Kimura, or Helio?

Kimura was fighting before MMA was a thing. He won tons of judo tourneys and was a pro wrestler.
He whopped Helio and Helio came in talking tons of shit. The Gracie's are liars and most of their shit was stolen from Maeda.

"Durrrr, I was fighting before MMA was a thing". Convenient excuse, don't you think?

The cool thing about the Gracies is that they're not just judo. They're rooted in hardcore jujitsu, sure, but they were pioneering figures in the MMA world, incorporating any techniques that worked, and expanding the stale and outdated world of judo into the multidisciplinary art of violence that it is today.

Again, Helio never submitted to Kimura. Helio never gave up. But Kimura, Kimura was a sore loser and a quitter. He's lucky he was so good, otherwise he would have folded decades earlier.

Fedor was terribly overrated. He would have been smashed by Bork Laser.

Agreed that he was overrated. 2/3rd of his wins are against total cans. Blonk's chin was awful though and he would have been steamrolled by Freedor.

There's no way Fedor could have defeated pre-diverticulitis Lesnar.

Fedor was too scared to go into UFC. UFC reached out to him many times, but Fedor would always reply with impossible demands. Its clear Fedor was content with whuppin' scrubs in the minor leagues.

A) Fedor's goofy-ass management is responsible for any silly demands B) you can't believe a word Dana White says because he's the ultimate shuckster.

It would have been big money for both parties. Fedor was a fool for ducking the UFC. He was demanding crazy shit like a stadium and 50% of Zuffa. I don't think it was his management. I trust Dana White.

Agreed on all of the above, including the contradictory pro-FEARdor/pro-Blackcockonchestnar points.

A small caveat on the "I trust Dana White" work, though:

1. Brock's done. Never coming back to the UFC.
2. Welllll, never say never.
3. The deal's almost done, you guys.
4. Start calling him out, aging heavyweight division.
5. Actually, the deal was never even close to begin with.
6. Cro Cop's looking great these days!

Its not Dana's fault Brock changed his mind last minute. Brock figured he'd be WWE Champ a lot longer. He was up against Roman Reigns. He didn't think Rollins would cash in his Money in the Bank in that manner.

There isn't a bigger blowhard crybaby doofus on the planet than Dana White. "We'll have the Gina Carano deal done by the end of the week". "MMA will be legal in New York by the end of the year". Done in by his own hubris on an almost daily basis.

I briefly met Fedor and despite not speaking any English whatsoever, I really couldn't imagine a more down-to-Earth superstar that this dude. It's pretty well-know (and even Dana cops to it) that his management was from another planet.