He's caught inbetween the singsongy inflection of serious newscasters and the sarcastic douchiness of the Max X announcer.

I think we've just heard the very first instance of audible uncanny valley.

Yeah, I love how he keeps delivering lines as if they're jokes but they're just straight reporting.

YOU MIGHT SAY HE WAS "VAPID" FUCK I'M ON A ROLL TODAY!

I visited a vape shop along with a friend who was trying to quit cigarettes and what we found there were a lot of guys who looked more or less like this:

http://i.imgur.com/IUa6M0o.jpg

there were dozens of these sort of fedora goons hanging about, blowing huge clouds of smoke from their various kinds of ridiculous custom vape rigs everywhere. Also, a few token chicks like a couple of fat girls with dyed hair and lots of ear piercings who laughed too loud and yelled out memes.

The influx of people like that has definitely contributed to me not going to shows lately.

Plus, you know, most of them are absolutely terrible for you:

https://www.sciencenews.org/article/health-risks-e-cigarettes- emerge

I guess vapers getting lungs full of heavy metal nanoparticles and testicles full of fire is just nature's way of dealing with this kind of behavior.

sweet christ BHWW, that fucking full moonface rising over the misty neckfold-moors

Secreted away in a forgotten attic is a portrait of him enjoying half of all the poontang and deadlifting the other half

I looked at that picture and immediately scrambled to play the song of time before it hits the earth.

Is that really Michael Alig?!

Yes, that's definitely Michael Alig.

I was going to sarcastically say how Alig totally is out of jail, except... wikipedai says he actually *is* out of jail? My world: it does not make sense anymore. That psychopathic was released, but hordes of non-violent drug offenders are in jail for life. Wonderful.