a star for every roll plus one for that supremely delectable cronch

A series of death boops.

My dog does that victory roll. On dead worms in the street.

what a good kitty

Counterpoint: rattlesnakes will go out of their way to leave you alone unless you're an unavoidable threat, whereas a bobcat will fuck you up if it gets a chance, just because it can.

I can haz the place where I murdered you to roll around in?

I met this old man when I was a kid in rural California. I was probably 9. I was hanging out in a tree near my house because I hadn't many friends and was bored and some girl and her sister, who were visiting family there during the summer ride by on their bikes and see me. They invite me to ride bikes. The old sister heads home and younger one, about my age, says she's going to so and so's house. I follow her. We head down towards the little league field which is on the south side of the valley near the river and up the drive of some random house. An old man about 80 answers the door. This is who we are visiting. She just likes this old guy. So he welcomes us into his kitchen. Looking back he must have survived the depression and fought in WWII. He offers us water, then just asks out of the blue if we carry sticks with us when we walk near the little league field or along the river. We said "no, why?" He says that if we ever see any rattle snakes on the trail, we can bop them on the head; not hard, just over and over, and it'll kill them. The bobcat was doing to the rattlesnake just what this old guy said we ought to do. At any rate, then he tells us we have to leave because he needs to take a nap. The girl and I ride back towards where we met, then split off and each go our separate ways. I never saw her or the old man again. That's it. That's my story.