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Desc:Yes, you can tell everyone you pass on the street that you don't masturbate any more.
Category:Religious, Fashion
Tags:masturbator, Xtian, p4cm, blue balls
Submitted:jangbones
Date:02/05/09
Views:3901
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Comment count is 41
DerangedGoblin - 2009-02-05

I remember a comment Sunday School Musical not that long ago accusing Christians of scratching the barcodes off of whatever's popular and then slapping Christianity on that product.
To whoever wrote that comment...
Look what you have done!


Raoul Duke 138 - 2009-02-05

If I saw a woman wearing a shirt that said "Ex-Masturbator" my first thought would be that she must be pretty horney, and therefore she might be easy to fuck.


HURF BLURF DUH - 2009-02-05

Not only that, but the approach would be soo easy: "Hey, that takes a lot of courage to wear that shirt. You must really be strong in your faith. What church do you attend?" Pants off in fifteen minutes.


Lindner - 2009-02-05

... something about two ladies discussion self pleasure excites me. I think I'm going to fall off the masturbation wagon now.


TeenerTot - 2009-02-05

I'm an ex-maturbater. But I have a boyfriend now.


citrusmirakel - 2009-04-09

That made you stop.

You fucking chickenshit. Where's your commitment?


Old_Zircon - 2009-09-01

That's not the way to do it.


Caminante Nocturno - 2009-02-05

I'm an X-Masturbator, or as I like to call myself, MYSTERIOUS MASTURBATOR X!

MYSTERIOUS MASTURBATOR X, CHAMPION OF JUSTICE!


voodoo_pork - 2009-02-05

What would your superpowers be?


Mend0zA - 2009-02-05

http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=47093


Xenocide - 2009-02-05

OH NO! THE MACH FIVE IS GOING TO CRASH! OH WAIT I AM SAVED BY A TORRENT OF STICKY FLUID! THANK YOU MYSTERIOUS MASTURBATOR X! BUT I WONDER AS TO YOUR TRUE IDENTITY!


sinuendo - 2009-02-05

I know she's using the phrase, 'in bondage' in a completly non-sexual way.....but my mind can't process it.


Camonk - 2009-02-05

Well but when the really ugly woman comes in about halfway through it kind of ruins the erotic potential. I became an ex-masturbator at that point.


mon666ster - 2009-02-05

I'm an ex-masturbator in the sense that I'm not currently masturbating right this minute. But I was a masturbator this morning before I left for work, and I'll probably fall off the masturbation wagon within 5 minutes of getting home. It's a vicious cycle.


chumbucket - 2009-02-05

promotion of masturbation? who's doing that and how are those profit margins?

also between seeing this and the "let's talk about what punk means" video, I'm wanting to know what's taking the terrorists so long to end it all.


boner - 2009-02-05

Some of us need a t-shirt that says "I'm masturbating right now".


jangbones - 2009-02-05

or "I will be masturbating within the next hour"


kingofthenothing - 2009-11-24

for guys: "Have Gun, Will Travel" will work just fine.


poopskin - 2009-02-05

this video doesn't work for me for some reason. If there's a link to actually purchase this t-shirt, can someone please post it for me? I want one.


Camonk - 2009-02-05

I know. I would totally wear one. And ladies would say to me, Oh so you don't masturbate? And I'd be like, Well you make me want to fall off the wagon. How about you come back to my place and help me stay strong? I could help you not masturbate anymore, too.

It would be a recipe for love and procreation, which is what these people want.


Camonk - 2009-02-05

http://p4cmtshirts.bigcartel.com/
They are TEN FREAKING DOLLARS. That is basically giving you an awesome shirt for free. Shipping is kind of high, but it is still an extremely reasonable price.


millerman13 - 2009-02-05

Meh, fuck em. But shit, at least they aren't cooking up crack and having 54,834 kids.


pastorofmuppets - 2012-04-02

As far as you know.


lordpotato - 2009-02-05

Perhaps the only thing that could trump a "masturbator" shirt for pathetic rating.

The most bogus shirt indeed.


Syd Midnight - 2009-02-05

TBQH a "masturbator" t-shirt is still slightly classier than "ex-masturbator".


1394 - 2009-02-05

"Yeah baby, I used to masturbate. I mean, I still do, but I used to too."


TheDevilsDictionary - 2009-02-05

r.i.p.


gotterdamm - 2009-02-05

Skip to 17:20 for something that brings up a lot of psychological questions.


charmlessman - 2009-02-05

They're all insane. But I kind of want an Ex-Diva shirt.


wtf japan - 2009-02-05

EX-WORLD CLASS MUFFDIVER WHO LIKELY WILL BE RENEWING HIS TITLE SOON


RockBolt - 2009-02-05

"Homosexuality is like the in thing right now, everyone wants to do it, everyone is trying it"


Deconvolution - 2009-02-05

EX-Masturbator.

Your ex. I masturbated to her.


Lauritz Melchior - 2009-02-05

"Wassup Wankster?"


Lauritz Melchior - 2009-02-05

Also, "masturbate" means "to stir up with the hands" etymologically.

Manus Turbare


Old_Zircon - 2009-09-01

So it's OK if you use, like, a melon with a hole in it or something?


Lauritz Melchior - 2009-02-05

I love how they've also got an "ex-hypocrite" T-shirt.


halon - 2009-02-06

Holy shit, I think I really want the "ex-rebel" and "ex-hustler" shirts


glasseye - 2009-04-09

Ex-hypocrite is perfect for me, since I used to be a christian.


YakooMarkTwo - 2009-02-25

I'm so glad someone submitted this. I watched this entire video one day and was just blown away by the rationale. At one point the "ex lesbian" girl says something like "I always knew it was a sin, but didn't know why. It's not in the scriptures, but you just KNOW it's an empty and evil thing to do" ... and then later, while recounting a conversation with her mother about the shirt, she says something about it BEING AGAINST THE WORD OF GOD (scripture).

Also, for a group of moral and chaste young adults, they SURE TALK A WHOLE LOT about sex, and very candidly. That room probably stunk with hormones.


voodoo_pork - 2009-04-13

I'm an Ex-ex-masturbator.


Riskbreaker - 2009-12-29

FAP!


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