Euphagus cyanocephalus has had it up to HERE with us apes.

It just wants to taste you!

Is CNN just YouTube now?

I FOR ONE WELCOME OUR NEW AVIAN OVERLORDS

I ALSO WELCOME A NEW JOKE

Needs an "Alfred Hitchcock was right" tag.

I'm confused. This plays like a practical-joke show clip, but how did they hire the bird?

One of these birds attacked me on Friday on my way home from work. Apparently if you get too close to their nest they freak out, and the dumbass birds built their nests in pedestrian-heavy areas.