Dwayne is very underrated, everyone likes to focus on Bill, but Bill actually seems to suffer from some mental illness. Dwayne is honestly convinced, and very aware, of all the bullshit he talks about. He believes in it, and that makes him even more patetic.

There is someone out there for Dwayne. It's just that he would reject her.

Dwayne... I thought he had committed suicide after killing a lady. Guess I'm thinking about someone else, or channeling memories from the near future.

"The hit list of high expectations" sounds like a Republican talking point sound bite.

Look at those power ties.

Well he's sort of upright now, instead of stretched out over some unfortunate mattress.

Yes, if there is any expert on today's dating scene it's good old Dwayne...

I think Dwayne's entire life has been nothing but one bad influence after another.

If having to choose between sex and those 5 Big Macs a day is such a fucking chore, then just kill yourself already.

Not everybody can magically erase their appearance problems with a little self-control.