Just eat the fuckin' thing.
I made it to: "I'm Baeeeeeck!"
Why do people do videos in of from their car? I can't even smoke in my car on the way to work without feeling like some homeless serial killer
He's way too fat to be homeless, he's in a decent car eating a burger. Jury is still out on the serial killer part
There's no such thing as "way too fat to be homeless". Some of the fattest people I know are homeless guys.
No. But I imagine there'd be fat homeless people in Iowa, too.
I've never seen a fat homeless person as fat as Tubs O'Butta up there here in Tennessee
I live in CT and I can assure you that they get fat as landwhales up here. Fatter than this guy, even.
Part of the problem is that a lot of homeless guys don't "look the part", so you won't necessarily realize that the guy you're looking at is homeless.
Jet Bin Fever
Oh yeah, I see fat homeless people far more frequently than skinny ones at shelters in my area. I blame the abundance of cheap, unhealthy, highly caloric garbage like shown in this video too.
Well maybe I don't pay attention. I know of some chunky ones. The only homeless person I run into on semi regular basis is this weird guy downtown who hands out dead weeds to people and says "give this pretty flower to your pretty lady" and stands around and talks your ear off
Like, I'll give you an example. This one guy I knew, Tim, met him shortly after I came home from the Army. The poor fellow looked EXACTLY like Comic Book Guy - same ponytail, same goatee, had to be 350 going on 400. That's why I decided to get to know him, actually, because come on, Comic Book Guy!
Anyway, turns out Tim had been homeless for going on six months. Before that, he lived with his eighteen year old girlfriend. Tim was thirty two. This was causing some conflicts with the girlfriend's mom, so she booted him out on the street. I remember all this, because I got his girlfriend into financial domination. See, she was (apparently, according to Tim) a nympho with some serious S&M fetishes, stemming from the years of childhood sexual abuse she'd suffered at her stepfather's hands. It was totally cool though, at least according to Tim, who incidentally had been convicted of assault and placed on probation after throwing the poor girl through a door in a drunken rage. That was another reason why the mom had thrown him out onto the streets. The under-age thing, and the throwing-her-daughter-through-a-door thing. Anyway, this girl, she'd dropped out of school ages ago, and was turning tricks in a local motel. Tim tagged along as her... well, he said "pimp", but I'm fairly certain he was lying through his scraggly teeth. I got the feeling she was just letting him come along for the ride, cuz he never saw a dime out of the money she made. Dude was HER bitch, not the other way around. She was making decent money, too; didn't even have sex with her clientele, she just took local businessmen and college professors up to her favorite room, tied them up, and kicked 'em in the balls for an hour, or until they came, whichever happened first. But, according to Tim, she was getting real tired of her exciting and glamorous life beating the shit out of middle aged men, so I'm like, hey! What about financial domination? (learned about THAT particular scam from Poe-Red! No shit! All this time spent on the internet DOES actually translate into real life on occasion!) Financial domination is easier and safer than being a motel whore, and it's a good deal more profitable, too. Well, I was out of a job at that point, hurting for money, so MY plan in all this was to be the middleman. Set up the website for her, manage her clientele, and take a cut of the proceeds so *I* wouldn't wind up homeless like her fatberg boyfriend. At first I was half-serious, because come on, me? Running a porn site? Hurr durr yeah right DREAM ON HOMIE. But then they looked like they were seriously considering my plan, and I got all excited. For NOTHING, as it turned out. One week later, I see Tim again, and I'm like hey buddy, what does your girlfriend think about my proposal, should I get started on her website? And he's like, oh yeah, I forgot to tell her about you, she went and did it all without you so FART FART FART. She made a thousand bucks in her first fucking week being an e-whore, and I didn't even get so much as a "thanks-for-the-idea" from either of them. Last time I drop a golden business pitch in some fatberg's lap without a contract in place beforehand, I tell you what. Anyway, last I saw him, Tim got arrested and sent to prison for violating his probation. He was caught stealing thirty dollars worth of Hot Pockets from a local convenience store (he'd blown his entire monthly EBT check on cigarettes and chewing tobacco the day before). Good riddance, that backstabbing bastard.
And that's how I know about fat homeless people.
Poor people are fat because fast, cheap food is filled with corn starch, fructose and salt. If you've ever been in transition and really broke (or homeless), you know how hard it is to get good food and fresh produce. It can also be a lack of diet education and in some cases mental illness that contributes to obesity in the poor. Mexico is now has a bigger obesity epidemic than America, and it's due to a large share of the population abandoning traditional healthy Mexican food for quick fix junk.
Stick around for the last minute.
It's like an ode to American consumption. Fast food, in car, large gentleman, pointless "whooh"s and complaint about prices that are low by 1st world standards.
You're leaving out that this burger is in fact really greasy.
I mean, even in american fast food standards, this thing needs a entire roll of napkins.
The only thing left to make the burger more patriotic is to give the option of adding extra cheese...
...wait excuse me someone is trying to tell me something. Oh, really? Are you joking?
Well, alright then... USA #1!!!!
It is really fucking greasy. I've had two in order to see if maybe the first one was a mistake, but it was not... they are very greasy. Consistently.
Even he can't say his introduction without mocking himself.
|Spaceman Africa |
He's got more charisma than TheReportOfTheWeek guy that's for sure
I couldn't watch anymore at the point when he demonstrated the greasiness of the burger.
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