|Hugo Gorilla |
Is this epic?
- Unless the weightlifter was the first contestant, this does start in media res.
- A theme of ascension is clearly stated in the beginning.
- "A world of pain" is an epithet though, admittedly, not a classic example.
- No list or catalog of the weight-lifter's previous achievements, training history, or the people he's worked with is used.
- No muse or god was invoked; Calliope, Melpomene, or even Thalia would be good candidates.
Five stars for the media's slow-mo replay from every angle.
It's failURE. Fail is a verb not a noun, you fucking internet morons. C-, see me after, YOU CAN DO BETTER
Still, Phil Hartmann did him one better.
|Dinky Patterson |
One star for each screener.
Ow, ow, ow.
He trained his whole life for that. Haha.
At least his rectum didn't prolapse.
It's also totally fake. Someone's rectum prolapsing under strain makes sense to me, but why would the ass of his pants suddenly rip open as if he had an explosion in his colon?
It's not unheard of for athletes to rip open the seat of their pants, even if they don't blow out their intestine.
|Baby Finster |
Poor guy. 5 for the channel relentlessly replaying it from every possible angle, despite the anchor's pleas.
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