kevin nealon lol wtf
Well at least the gambling paid off.
Man that dude's life sounds pretty sweet now. I like how God was all, what their son isn't praying? Fine, DIVORCE for those dicks! And now the son is gonna get RICH and RESPECTED and the hot girls are gonna wanna get with him. Check and MATE Satan.
Dear God, I stopped praying like forever ago. I am still poor. Please correct this.
It's a shame Daniel, a damn shame. And now because of your lack of prayer, one of your kneecaps just spontaniously shattered. It's a hard old world, don't need an angel to tell you that. Course, I could bring it all back Daniel, just say the words.
Divorce: It really is the children's fault!
How is a Christian kid with divorced parents not going to immediately become an atheist after seeing this? Obviously God doesn't care enough about YOUR prayers, Billy!
this is so fucking evil.
Let's do the opposite.
Devil: Well, Daniel, you're sister was never taught about contraception, so now you're an uncle twice over, and she's only 17. Your parents are still married, but they hate each other, and they're both having affairs. Your mother's is with Ms. Baum. You dropped out of school because they teach evolution. Your parents home school you, but they're too busy fighting and fucking other people to give you a decent education. You're going to end up working at a truck stop, selling plastic crosses at the register for extra cash. All because you're a blinder-wearing Christian.
Life is good.
|Caminante Nocturno |
Smarmy dicks, at that.
Oh, you've got time to answer this kid's prayers about keeping his parents together, but not once did Kelly Callahan go down on me in the stairwell in high school. How often did this kid pray for his parents' marriage? Once a week? Once a day? Shit, I was hitting you up to grant MY prayer four times a period and six more times in study hall.
Fuck you, angel. You can take your genie-in-a-bottle ironic prayer-granting and shove it up your haloed ass.
No, listen, you only get cool shit when you stop praying. If you hadn't prayed you'd have gotten sucked off and an awesome car.
If divine intervention is the only thing keeping your parents together maybe they are better off apart.
|Goofy Gorilla |
This is obscene blasphemy of the highest order.
|Jaguar Wong |
The mirror-universe version of the Book of Job.
|Testicles of Doom |
If his sister was never born, that doesn't necessarily mean she's "dead", does it?
What is never born can never die.
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