Each player is in a sensory deprivation tank so the only thing they hear is the inhuman squealing of girl-like creatures being slapped. Hard nosed, scientifically minded men keep notes on their every action.
Meanwhile, the GRU has to make do with Doom 2 with a mod that replaces imps with crudely drawn nude girls and an old Polybius machine that keeps eating quarters. When you're behind in the psychic desensitization game, it's hard to catch up.